Hello :)
| Life's little imperfections are what makes us who we are. | Log out |
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Its Monday, July 17, 2006, and the time now is 9:18:00 AM. i'm really really really tired.. i really am.. every single day, every single moment, i'm just trying to renew my mind, refresh my spirits.. trying to reaffirm the way things are. i am constantly burdened, bogged down by the past and the present.. but i try.. at least i try, to constantly remind myself of the Lord's fatihfulness to me, His perfect love for me, and i know that no matter what happens, my life is in his hands and i am in very good care... Hope is something so... precious, and this little detour here in my journey has been nothing short of an amazing one... what it means to hope, what it means to have faith... what it means to truly live your faith and make your faith real instead of just empty proclaiming.... so even though the problems are still here... even though i cry...i cry with a smile on my face, and i press on bravely, telling the Lord that "even though this is so hard and its hurting me so much deep inside... but Lord, my Lord, i am enjoying my quiet little walk with You here, right by my side... through it all..." this walk with the Lord is so... difficult, so hard.. but i know that i'm gonna learn things that will change my mind, change my insights and most importantly, change my heart.. so i thought it through again.. ploughing through all those unpleasant memories i believed i had erased completely from my mind.. i thought i had progressed, moved on and stopped myself from regressing...and that the past will no longer come to mind.. but right now i don't want to do anything that will jeopardise this peace i took so long to find...not now, not ever... ____ regret is an ugly feeling. |